It’s no secret that men don’t like to talk about their feelings out But If you’ve been wondering about the little things, like whether or not you’re being too assertive, or too loud, these 10 men want to clear up any doubts you might be having about your performance during s*x.  Do you agree with what these fellas have to say?

1. Stroking His Ego

“It’s not just our dick that we want stroked—it’s our egos too. I love it when girls play me up to make me sound like I’m Mr. Incredible. It’s a nice feeling… sometimes even more satisfying than the sex itself.” -Jason, 25

2. Giving Him A Good View

“Guys are visual, we like looking at you while we’re doing it, and we like not having to ask you to get into the positions that show off your body best—like reverse cowgirl.” -Dan, 33

3. Surprising Him

“One time, this girl I had been dating for a month or so pulled me into a stairwell at the club we were at, and had sex with me right there. I’m not saying you should always do things that could get you arrested, but we love to be surprised with things that stray from the normal bedroom routine.” -Christian, 28

4. Showing Him How To Get You Off

“I want the girl I’m doing it with to get off as much as I want to. The last girl I slept with actually took my hand and started getting herself off with it, which was so hot to watch, and taught me what she likes at the same time.” -Patrick, 34

5. Talking Dirty

“We’re not looking for a play by play, but phrases like ‘harder’ or pretty much any curse word that comes out of your mouth in regards to how good what I’m doing to you feels is a huge turn-on.” -Mike, 21

6. Making Some Noise

“Noises and talking are great. Believe it or not, men have even more insecurities in bed than women, so we like the audible reassurance that you like what we are doing.” -Joe, 27

7. Turning On The Lights

“The last girl I dated always wanted to do it with the lights on, even if we were doing it in the middle of the night. The fact that she always wanted me to see every inch of her while we were going at it, no matter what the circumstances, was really hot.” -Joe, 25

8. Taking Control

“An older woman I had been dating actually pinned me down, told me not to move, got on top of me and gave it to me for a solid 10 minutes. Taking the reigns like that every once in a while totally does it for me.” -Jeff, 24

9. Making Eye Contact

“When a girl looks directly at me right as I’m putting it in her, it’s a huge turn-on. Something about watching her expression change as it goes in is really appealing to me.’”-James, 29

10. Showing Up

“All you have to do is show up. Yes, sad but true, most men are just trying to get a woman in their bed, so once that is accomplished, she has done her job. Don’t get me wrong, I have had a few ‘dead fish’ or arrhythmic women in my time, but other than that, the rest is easy. Have some enthusiasm about what you are doing, and the rest is a bonus.” -Darren