Social stigma asks women to believe that they are the ones who cling on to the relationship. But did you ever think that it might be the other way around? What if the guy you are dating is extremely mushy and sentimental, maybe even overbearing and annoying? Well, with the rise of alpha female and beta male relationships in the society, the problem with men being the needy ones is on the rise. However, we tend to ignore it more often because it has not been very common in the past.
Insecurity is the real reason for men to cling on to you – the fear of their feisty women being seduced by their coworkers, neighbors, friends, is something they just can’t shake off. Also, certain personality types are genuinely needier than others.
Find out if your guy is one of them.
1. He gets upset too often: You didn’t reply to his last text, or you didn’t text back quick enough and he is super upset. Now he expects you to pamper him, to say sweet nothings to him, and lull him back to normalcy. This is a sure sign of a man whose life depends on you. Although a very sweet notion, it can become annoying when you have really important work at hand and they are asking to be pampered at the snap of their fingers.
2. You are forbidden from seeing anyone else: So you want to have a girls’ night out? Forget it! He will offer to come along. It’s like you can’t do anything in your life without having his shadow around! And if you forbid him from coming along, then we go back to point 1: he becomes angry and distant. And on the off chance he DOES let you out for a night on the town, he’ll keep asking for details of the event every five seconds- how annoying!
3. Consistent calls and texts throughout the day: All right- there is definitely a limit to which we all can extend our affection. If he keeps texting you every hour of the day and making your phone buzz throughout the night– it is definitely an alarming sign. Not only that but he also argues that you aren’t doing anything so you could easily talk to him. Give yourself a break. Every person is entitled to their “me “time and do not let anyone emotionally manipulate you out of it.
4. Wanting to see you often and more often: So you had a tiring week and you want to lay low at home for the weekend. Well that is just not possible when you have the “Needy man” around. He wants to be there no matter what. In his mind, he is comforting you and trying to fill your loneliness. The needy man is filled with sweet notions like that, only he doesn’t know that you actually WANT to be left alone. It is very important for everyone to realize the importance of giving a person his/her free space, but a needy man simply won’t understand that.
5. He spies on you: If a guy plays like he’s a detective, tracking your Facebook profile and following you on every social media platform available on the internet, aside from being totally scary, it’s a sure sign of a needy man. Did he know all about your favorite band on your first date? Did he know your date of birth? This may be a sign that he did a bit of personal research on you. And that’s just downright creepy.
6. He loves to fight with you: Be alarmed when your guy simply loves fighting with you. Some guys have this strange idea that they need to fight with you when they need you, and they believe that making a girl feel less of a person will make her cling on to him– but this is where they fail to keep the relationship alive. Women don’t like a man who treats them like that!
7. He is speeding fast like a rocket: Since the first date he can’t wait to be in a relationship with you. He already has plans for the future for the two of you. Men usually don’t do that, but when they do, you can be assured that he is a needy man and the rest of the needy man traits are sure to follow. He is more than ready to say goodbye to the early stages of romance- going on dates, sharing memories- and jump right into engagement and moving in together. HUGE red flag!
8. He needs to be reassured over and over: This man simply doesn’t believe that the feelings you have for him are real. You have to keep telling him over and over again, or you have to keep proving your love to him by doing little gestures for him. Deeply he is very insecure and needs to feel secure with his feelings.
9. What he does feels like too much, too soon: It’s okay to bring flowers on the first date- women love that. But if he’s going (way) above and beyond way too soon- let’s say, a $100 gift card to your favorite store before the first date- there may be a problem. He’s trying to win your love way too fast, and that’s definitely a needy sign!
10. Sweet talking: Oh this man will sweet talk you like no one else. This is the yang side of point 8, where he is willing to give you sweet talk as much as wants it from you. He will come up with the weirdest times for sweet talk. He is trying to reaffirm you that he really loves you – over and over and over again. All this is kind of sweet, yes, but dreaming of your future together just in the first weeks of being together? That is creepy. This means either he is utterly hooked onto you and has fantasized you for a very long time, or he is desperately in the need of a woman.
Have you ever been with a needy man? What were the signs?