Commitment is a sweet and beautiful word that changes the parameters of a relationship. However, at times, this ‘C’ letter word is powerful enough to send the otherwise stalwart men running for the hills. While, it turns the otherwise sensible young women into scheming stereotypes (worthy to be in a soap opera!). We hate to break it to you ladies, but no matter how much you plot, you cannot get a man to commit unless he wants to stay.
Things you are doing wrong
Before we get to the part where we actually tell you about how to get your man to commit, we would like to list down certain methods that most likely will fall flat on their face:
This one is a strict no-no, ladies. If you have already talked to him before and if he has still not opened up to the idea, then let the subject drop. Discussing the same thing again and again will only make him irritable.
Making him jealous
If you think that jealousy might get him to take the plunge, then you are wrong. Flirting with other men might just send some wrong signals to him. Instead of making him realise what he would be missing if he lost you, you might just lose him altogether. So, steer clear of this one.
Giving an ultimatum
You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink it. If you think that you can get him to commit by saying, “Either we get married or I am going to dump you”, then you are mistaken. You would not want a commitment only because he has no other choice? And besides, would you stay in a relationship with someone who issued threats to get his own way?
How to make him commit to you
With such ways, if you do succeed to get a commitment out of him, odds are that your relationship will not be as stable as the one that grew naturally over a period of time. So, let us tell you a few things that might actually work at getting a proposal out of him.
Have a serious conversation
Have a serious conversation about your future together. Talk to him about his doubts, as there might be certain things he would want to achieve before settling down. Relevant doubts or reasons to delay marriage can be discussed over logically. But, if he is not willing to commit to you for some trivial reason, then it is your time to re-evaluate the relationship, we believe!
Throw in subtle hints
Leaving in subtle hints here and there would not hurt your relationship. Drop lines like, “looks like a lot of our friends are getting married now”, or “have you read that interesting article on the destination wedding locations in India?” You can also leave hints with gesture like, checking out wedding pictures of your friends, browsing through wedding websites in front of him, etc. We are sure you know how smart your boyfriend really is, to catch up on these.
Just as you want your man to be a shoulder to cry on, he too wants a woman he can talk openly to without being judged. This is the best way to make your man realise that how indispensable you are in his life. Make him feel safe in talking to you about each and everything.
Show him that you are not a cage
At times, men are unable to commit as they see this as a huge change. They feel that things will change too much and too soon. It is your job to make sure that he sees you more as an equal, rather than as a cage or a responsibility. Make it clear that he can keep (reasonable) amount of freedom intact even after he makes a commitment to you, like going out with friends, etc.
Reveal some and hide some
It is best to be honest and truthful to the man you love. But, at times giving too much away in a relationship might not leave any chance for him to explore the ideas of commitment. Stay physically unavailable for him till he commits. Also, give him a glimpse of how vivacious and adventurous and open-minded you will be even when you take on the ‘wife’ tag.
These list of things will soon get him down on his knees with a sweet proposal and an amazing ring to surprise you with!