Flirting can be a scary thing, especially if you’re shy. Even a smile from your crush can turn your cheeks red and render you unable to string sentences together. Although there’s nothing wrong with being shy – it’s part of your personality, after all – it can get in the way of relationships and meeting new people, especially guys. Below we’ve given you some expert flirting tips to overcome your shyness and let that gorgeous guy know how you feel.
1. Work on your self-confidence
Flirting is all about self-confidence, which is why shy girls often struggle with it. You need to believe in yourself in order to show others how awesome you really are. So, before you start flirting with your crush, spend a bit of time working on your self-confidence.
Make a list of all your best features (e.g., clever, funny, nice eyes) and stick it on your mirror in your bedroom. Every time you look in the mirror, have a look at the list and remind yourself of all your best qualities. You’ll soon feel better about yourself, and ready to start flirting with your crush.
2. Learn to accept compliments
Often, when you’re shy and lack self-confidence, it’s difficult to accept a compliment. A guy might flirt with you and compliment you on your hair/eyes/intelligence, and all you can say in response is, “Oh, it’s not that great…”. Instead of faltering and dismissing the efforts of others to make you feel good about yourself, try simply thanking them for their compliment.
It doesn’t matter if you blush or can’t make eye-contact, as long as you are continuing the conversation and showing that you appreciate their kind words. Once you’re more confident, you can even make witty responses that show your sense of humour.
3. Get your friends to help you out
Have you ever asked a friend to tell your crush that you like him? Sometimes, getting your friends to help you out can be a great idea. Once they make the first move, and you receive positive feedback, it paves the way for you to talk to him yourself. Be sure to follow through – you may regret passing up an opportunity to talk to your crush and flirt with him.
4. Use body language
If you find that you can’t speak to your crush without blushing and stammering, try using your body language to flirt with him. A shy smile and lingering eye contact can work wonders, letting him know that you are interested in him. When you’re talking to him, angle your body so that your feet are pointing in his direction. This gives him a subconscious message that you want to be close to him, and he might come closer to you too.
You can also attract his attention by playing with your hair as you talk to him, or subtly mimicking the gestures he uses when talking. Mimicking him (without him noticing, of course!) creates a subconscious bond between the two of you that makes him feel closer to you. Good to know!
5. Fake it ’til you make it
Confidence doesn’t come naturally to all of us, and sometimes you’ll need to be brave and just go for it. It’s been found that pretending to be confident can actually make you feel more confident over time, so a little bluffing in the beginning may actually help you in the long run.
Before making a move, try these tips to clear your head and make you feel more relaxed:
- Take deep, measured breaths and focus on regular breathing
- Clench your toes to release nervous tension
- Think positive thoughts, and use them to replace negative thoughts
Chances are, once you start talking to your crush and flirting with him, you’ll forget all about your anxiety and you’ll be focusing on him completely.
6. Live without regrets
It may be easier to appreciate your crush from a distance, but in a few years time, you might regret never having the courage to speak to him. Try weighing up the pros and cons of approaching your crush and talking to him. Some cons might be rejection, embarrassment, or not knowing what to say; but the pros might outweigh the cons – he might feel the same, and your brave move could mark the start of a great relationship.
Above all, you should embrace your personality and your shyness, but not let it get in the way of getting the things that you want. By gradually building your self-confidence and taking risks, you open yourself up to many opportunities, such as getting to know your crush and letting him know how you feel. These tips will help you to flirt with your man, but the decision to go for it ultimately comes from you.