#1 Just Not You
If you’ve ever been told by your partner or potential love interest that they’re “not ready to date”, or that they “need to be single for now”, then you will definitely want to read this. We can understand the confusion in this situation, especially if two weeks later they’re dating someone else. The truth is they are ready to date, however, they just don’t want to date you.
Harsh, right? There’s plenty of other fish in the sea, as they say, so move on and find someone who actually appreciates you.
#2 Baggage Drop-Off
A lot of relationships begin while one person is ‘on the rebound’. This simply means that they are still dealing with the hurt and heartbreak of being dumped and rejected by their former flame, and they have now began a new relationship with the purpose of forgetting this hurt. We’ve got news for you – this is dangerous relationship territory!
Everyone carries a bit of emotional baggage with them, but expecting the new partner to suddenly make everything better is extremely unfair, to both your new partner, and yourself.
If you’re having trouble dealing with your heartbreak, then take a step away from the dating game until you feel confident with yourself again.
#3 Red Alert!
Here’s a common relationship problem that is often ignored! Do you find your family and friends disliking your new boyfriend or girlfriend? Or, even more extreme, do you find absolutely everyone hating your new boyfriend or girlfriend? This is the biggest ‘red alert’ signal, and there are a number of reasons why you won’t understand their dislike.
Firstly, you’re probably in a state of loved-up bliss, but this soon will pass. Secondly, you’re probably not aware of the more distasteful facts about your new partner, but everyone else is. There very well could be legitimate reasons as to why everyone around you thinks you can do better…because you can!
#4 Blame Game
Is your dating life a mess? It might seem like the easiest option to just blame all of this on your parents’ own messed-up relationship, but the truth is that it’s time to take some responsibility. A lot of children grow up with arguing parents, or they even experience their mother and father going through a divorce.
But this should not impact anyone’s own adult relationships or marriage. ‘Each to their own’ as they all say. Just because your parents had a turbulent marriage, doesn’t necessarily mean you will!
#5 Reply Already!
We’ve all been here before, constantly checking our phones, email or instant messenger desperately waiting for our love interest to reply! Before you get ahead of yourself and assume a reply that takes longer than ten or twenty minutes means they’re just not that into you, think again.
A reply that takes a week or longer is obviously a cause for alarm bells, however, timing a reply right up to the exact second it was sent is extremely naive and obsessive. You can’t expect them to be glued to their phone 24 hours a day! It’s time to put those unrealistic expectations away for good…
#6 Control Freak!
If you’ve become a bit of a dating control freak, then it’s time to take a step back! Dating can certainly be an emotional roller coaster, and no one knows what will happen next. You can control some things, such as instead of waiting for them to contact you, why not pick up your phone first?
But other than the small stuff, you just have to trust that the rest will fall into place. Dating is as uncertain as life itself, so it’s best to hang in there and enjoy the ride. Have faith in both yourself and your partner, and remember, trying to control someone else will only make them resent you – Not cool!
#7 Evil Ex Myth
These days, it seems as though almost everyone has an evil ex-partner. This evil ex then seems to have all of the blame heaped onto them, and the backstabbing begins. The truth is, just because you are no longer dating them, doesn’t mean they are satanic, or that suddenly you should hate their guts (without good reason to).
Accept that there was a period in your life when you liked them, perhaps even loved them. There were plenty of good times, as well as bad, but you honestly were attracted to them at some point, right? Plus, how would you like it if you knew your ex was going around spreading horrible stories about you?
#8 Too Complicated?
Not getting along well with the opposite sex? Don’t worry, we’ve heard all of the excuses. The most common complaint is that the opposite sex is “complicated” or “crazy”. Trust us, if you actually went to the effort of trying to understand them, you would.
It’s time to open the channels of communication and to ask questions. Let your date or partner know if you don’t agree with them, or you’re finding their argument a little hard to grasp. Relationships are all about effort, not just waiting for the heavens to miraculously make everything perfect all of the time.
#9 Ultimate Friend Zone
What happens when you’ve been put in the “friend zone”? Most males and females choose to hold onto whatever minuscule gleam of hope they can find, wrong move.
They hang in there, thinking that if they’re nice enough, or they’re there to catch their love interest when they fall, that suddenly they will move from “friend zone” to “lover”. Want the truth? If someone doesn’t see you as a potential partner, then they probably never will. Don’t act like a puppy and beg for them, and certainly don’t trick them into liking you. It’s time to move on…
#10 The One?
So, you’ve been on a couple of dates with a girl or a guy, and you want to know if they’re “the one”…Our advice? Stop! It’s time for people to stop assuming that this person might just be “the one” for them.
Slow down and enjoy the relationship for what it is. If they are “the one” who you end up spending the rest of your life with, you certainly won’t realize this overnight! Close relationships take a long period of time to reach that stage, so try not to get caught up in thinking so far ahead. You know the saying, if it ain’t broke why fix it?
If the person you are dating is showing signs of trying to change you or transform you in some way, then this is not a good sign. Why, you ask? The answer is simple: they should like you for you, not the idea of you.
Telltale signs include: a boyfriend trying to tell his girlfriend that she is putting on weight or a girlfriend trying to transform her boyfriend into a jock. No matter how subtle the clues, you can’t deny them. If your partner won’t accept you for who you are now, then we hate to break it to you, but they never will. So kiss them goodbye!
#12 EX-tra Trouble
Oh no, your date is talking about their ex again? We hate to break it to you, but this never has, and never will be a good sign.
Clearly if their ex continues to be a talking point, then they are continuously on their mind. And you know what this means? They’re just not over them! This person clearly isn’t ready to get back into the dating game. Do both yourself, and your date a favor – Walk away and give them time. Alarm bells are ringing for a reason, and a relationship built on someone being on the rebound is just not worth it.
#13 Bonus Points!
Here’s a dating truth everyone needs to realize! It’s totally okay for you to make the first move. No longer should it be a case of acting disinterested or waiting for your love interest to let you know how they feel.
By acting detached and unavailable, you’re only sending the wrong message to your crush – No wonder you’re not getting anywhere! If you’re worried about seeming desperate or clingy, don’t be! If you show someone that you like them and are interested in getting to know them better, then you’ve already earned some bonus points in their eyes.
#14 Down The Toilet
So you’ve been on a date with someone and suddenly they’re not replying to your texts. Their excuse? They’ve lost their phone, accidentally dropped it into the toilet, or it’s getting fixed, don’t buy it.
Before you fall for these excuses, think about this: Perhaps they just didn’t want to talk to you? It may seem harsh, but the truth is that if they wanted to get in contact with you, there certainly are other ways. Have they ever heard of Facebook or Twitter? Enough said.