If a guy slapped you on your second date, you would probably slap him back or never see his face again. But if your boyfriend of 3 years starts manhandling you, will you leave him at that instant? You are taking time to think and that is the key to how relationships become abusive over a period of time. No relationship has verbal or physical abuse to begin with. Then, how do abusive relationships start? There is a clear process behind the beginning of a potentially abusive relationship.

How It Begins? When you meet the guy of your dreams, you will never doubt that he could hurt a fly. He will ideally be Mr Right whom you have been waiting for all your life. You are excited about finding the love of your life. He is loving, attentive and can’t seem to get enough of you. You are on cloud nine until he pushes you for more commitment. If your partner is potentially abusive, he will propose marriage quickly or want to get physical with you too soon. You have a feeling of discomfort but you are too ‘high’ on love to displease him.

The Red Flags

Once your partner is sure that you are completely into him, he will start showing the signs of violence. This is when signs of an abusive relationship begin to appear. He will start becoming more demanding, he will isolate you from your friends and will begin manipulating you in all ways possible. This will lead to a period of intense tension.

The Act of Violence

If you really want to know how a happy relationship becomes abusive, then it would have to be the day the actual violence begins. He will have an outburst (justified by the period of tension) and subject you to physical or mental violence. Having had his catharsis, he will go back to being Mr Right.

The Cycle Of Violence

After your partner abuses you, he will look genuinely apologetic. They will shed (crocodile) tears of guilt and ask for your mercy. Then, he will treat you like a queen to make up for his minor indiscretion. You will start feeling special again and forgive his crime. That is how an abusive relationship starts. There is no end to this cycle of violence because he will continue to abuse you at regular intervals.

Identify the signs of an abusive men early on so that you can walk away from the relationship without scars. And for that; it is vital to know how abusive relationships start or how seemingly happy relationships become abusive.

Read more at: http://www.boldsky.com/relationship/love-and-romance/2014/how-happy-relationships-become-abusive-042799.html