How your love life is going depends a lot on how you approach it. Here are 12 types of single girls to help shine a light on what your style is (they each have upsides and downsides but there’s one that we think is ideal – you have to read on to see which one it is!):
1. The Romantic. You’ve watched every rom com out there and are looking for a soulmates-kind-of-love like Allie and Noah’s in The Notebook. Settling is definitely not your thing. You’ll know you’ve found THE guy because he’ll shower you with love, affection and gifts while whispering poetry in your ear at a dinner he organized next to a waterfall as a band he hired plays your favorite songs beneath the setting sun. It will be beautiful.
If you’re her, remember: There’s nothing wrong with holding out for your soulmate or expecting your guy to be a romantic but be reasonable. Men in real life don’t behave like characters played by Ryan Gosling on screen.
2. The Cynic. You’re not a fool. You’ve been around the block once or twice and your bullshit detection system is so tight, it could have been built by NASA. When you meet a guy, you don’t fall hard and fast — you actually assume he’s an asshole from the beginning and make him prove he’s not — you’ve had your heart broken a few times and, damnit, you will not let it happen again.
If you’re her, remember: We’re all for making a guy prove he’s worthy before letting him in but being too careful/scared can make you seem closed and limit your opportunities. Be open, hope for the best, and take chances. Like they say in the lottery ads, you can’t win if you don’t play!
3. The Picky B*itch. You are the bomb so, of course, it takes an extraordinary man to capture your attention. If he doesn’t check all the boxes on your ever-growing list, you can’t be bothered. Your friends say you’re being too selective but you disagree — you just have standards. You know what you want and you’re going to wait until he comes along.
If you’re her, remember: Love is an adventure — it’s unpredictable — so there’s a huge chance that the person who knocks your socks off won’t be anything like what you imagined. Toss that list and take every guy on a case-by-case basis. If you don’t, you could miss out on some amazing experiences, lessons and the guy of your dreams.
4. The Serial Dater. OMG, what’s everyone bitching about? It’s not that hard to find a guy. Maybe not for you because, well, you like everyone. That guy who’s totally boring? At least he has a good job. That guy who’s not smart at all? At least he’s fun. Your friends think it’s weird that you don’t have a type and accuse you of not having standards but you don’t care — as far as you’re concerned, they’re just jealous because you’re always with someone.
If you’re her, remember: Being open is great but being so open that you’re always taken isn’t healthy. It’s important to take some time for yourself in between relationships to reflect on what you need and really want — we bet you’ll suddenly become more picky.
5. The Desperate Chick. Like the Serial Dater, you’ll give anyone a shot but your reasons are different. You’re tired of dating and scared to end up alone. You NEED to be with someone, like right now, or you’re going to end up spending another evening binge-watching The Mindy Project with a bag of oreos. Your solution: trying really, really, REALLY hard.
If you’re her, remember: Trying too hard is an awesome way to end up with a terrible guy. You need to put dating and men out of your mind for a while and just have fun. Stop trying to force it… If you step back a little, stop obsessing, and take the pressure off, dating will be fun again.
6. The Fatalist. You are done. Not done like The Desperate Chick who’s just ready to accept anyone but DONE as in romantic comedies just straight up piss you off now because you realize what bullshit this whole love thing is. You tried, it didn’t happen, and now you’re just going to chill in your apartment and let yourself go because why even bother? All those people who are in love are eventually going to break up or get divorced anyway. You’re just saving yourself the heartache.
If you’re her, remember: Rejection, breakups, heartache — that stuff is HARD. But that doesn’t mean it’s okay to give up. The reward is too big not to try. You don’t realize that because you haven’t met the right person yet. But when you do, you’ll understand why it was all worth it. So stop bitching and pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back in the game.
7. The Alpha. You are fiercely independent. You don’t just have a job but a career, and no one has ever accused you of not having your shit together. You definitely want love in your life but guys have such weak egos that they’re usually intimidated by your success. What’s a girl to do? So, you just keep focusing on work, going on the occasional date when you can fit it in, hoping something will work out one of these days. And if not, oh well, work is already basically the love of your life anyway.
If you’re her, remember: Your life is what you make it. If you want love, you have to make room for it. It’s that simple.
8. The Clock Watcher. You want a baby. In fact, you want a baby so badly that you don’t even care about the guy. As long as he has good DNA and a job, you’re down to get knocked up (which is why you don’t even insist on condoms anymore). Sure, it would be nice to fall in love too but whatever — at this point, as long as you get some spermies that can swim, you’re cool.
If you’re her, remember: We get it. And if you want to go to a sperm bank or ask a guy friend for some of his stuff, that’s cool. But it’s not cool to go around having unprotected s*ex with the hope of finding yourself preggers. It’s actually kind of messed up.
9. The Mess. You don’t know what you want. As long as you’ve had a few drinks, you’re happy and open to anything and anyone. Sure, you often end up in compromising situations — puking in the street, waking up at some random’s house, stumbling home in a daze — but that’s what you do when you’re young, right?
If you’re her, remember: Being young is awesome but squandering that time in a haze of booze is not. And the guys you’re attracting — not the good ones. Get yourself together.
10. The Pragmatist. You’re all business. You’re not looking for fireworks but for a stable life partner you can trust. And finding him is your part-time job. You believe it’s all about putting in the time and effort… So, you’re focused and organized — you’re on all the dating sites and you go to all the right places. If you make this enough of a priority, and meet enough guys, one of them will eventually fit.
If you’re her, remember: What you’re doing is fine. Just remember to loosen up and have some fun too. If you let go a little, you might be surprised and end up not just with the stability you’re looking for, but the fireworks too.
11. The Princess. You have old-fashioned sensibilities and need a chivalrous guy. More than anything, you expect to be adored, taken care of and kept according to a certain lifestyle. Whether it’s sending you flowers, whisking you away for the weekend, or taking you shopping, the right guy for you will be the one who’s all about YOU.
If you’re her, remember: People in love take care of each other but if you’re all about being taken care of financially, you run the risk of coming off like a gold-digger. Just as women don’t like being objectified for our bodies, men don’t appreciate being objectified for their bank accounts.
12. The Zen Girl. Sure, it would be great to be in love but being single is pretty amazing too. While your girlfriends are obsessing about how to find their next boyfriend, you’re happy living in the moment, enjoying your freedom. After all, this is the youngest you’ll ever be and you might as well milk it for every ounce of fun.
If you’re her, remember: This is exactly how you should be. Live your life fully and everything you want will show up.